PILLOW - WEPT
01.17.03 . 3:36 p.m.
im just disctracting myself with music right now. i still have that "lonely" feeling...even after all these hours, i feel empty.
i have piles of paper on my desk that need to be worked on, but they wont get finished by days end. i can already tell. im moving in
motion this afternoon. slower than usual.
i need a hot bath. a warm bed. a warm body. toes touching mine. legs wrapped around mine. head pressed to my forehead. i need lips kissing my face. my mouth. my fingers. my belly.
i need it all.
and i need it now.
love is starting to mean less and less to me right now.
i guess im in doubt of all things pure.
i feel let down and betrayed by things that i cant even identify.
you have all escaped me.
nothing is even real anymore.
nothing ever really was.