the ghosts inside of the lights were struggling to fight the day

tiny particles of dust shook around the glass that covered the bulb

there was nothing left to save.

dawn was approaching

children were waking

mothers were nursing

fathers still slept

i tried to keep what was left of my dream

when i saw the sunlight leak thru bedroom curtains, i moved my head to the right

facing opposite the wall, and towards the door.

my legs remained outstretched and straight

i wasnt going to give in.

not yet.

not like this.

if i were to wake up, it would be on my own terms.

for i am not ready to start the day!

the sky can be cruel.

with all of her sisters and brothers.

i didnt expect it to pay me any favors

for i curse the sky when it rains on my vacation days

and i blame the sun for my headaches

and i curse the moon when i have to crawl to bed at 2am.

yes, i dont expect it to show me any kindness this Sunday morning

when i wish to remain sleeping.

when i was a little girl, i used to think

that the sun never came up if i wasnt awake

as if everything before my eyes opened

remained dark

i never wanted to miss a thing.

if a leaf fell to the earth from a branch,

it didnt happen unless i was awake, and i could witness it

and when i turned my back, things ceased.

but then

i had no excuse for Autumn.

x